Sunday 25 April 2010

Dear Jamesmaster,


Dear Jamesmaster: I've recently purchased 4.8 litres of Hagmann white wine for £3.80. Unfortunately it tastes like sour sherry and it makes my insides burn like sin. What can I do? Should I just pour the whole thing down a storm drain and chalk it up to experience? Rinse off the dog's shampoo? Trade it for cigarettes with a vagrant?

Foolish tippler! The solution to your problem was right under your nose when your initial lack of attention in the face of a bargain first got you into this pickle. However, this oversight can be easily rectified with my help: simply return to to the supermarket and purchse, in order, a large bottle of soda water, a bag of party ice and a plastic jug. These forces combined can be used to make a "mega spritzer" powerful enough to tame the mighty Torrontes you have chosen to battle. Enjoy your fizzy sherry water young adventurer! Until the next time and the next morning...

No comments:

Post a Comment